MEGALOMANIAC

I hear you on the radio
You permeate my screens, unkind heart
So much you ever seem to fly
I cut off both your wings on principal alone
On principal alone

Hey megalomaniac
You're not Jesus
Yeah, you're no fucking Elvis
Special, as you know yourself, maniac
Step down, step down
Step down

Are we your appendages?
hold open your eyes
So you would see
That all of us are heaven sent
There was never ment to be only one
To be only one

Hey megalomaniac
You're not Jesus
Yeah, you're no fucking Elvis
Special, as you know yourself, maniac
Step down, step down
Step down

Yeah
You're not Jesus
You're not Elvis
...
No, no, no, no

Hey megalomaniac
You're not Jesus
Yeah, you're no fucking Elvis
Special, as you know yourself, maniac
Step down, step down
Step down

************

Have you seen Incubus' latest video, Megalomaniac? It's so graphic, you won't be needing a second opinion on the message it conveys. It's so realistic, it will make you march out on the streets.

It's a cirque down there -- you can see Hitler, Jesus, Bush etc -- with all the sarcasm and satire of the current world.

Last week, thousands of activists marched to the streets to lambast US on it's attack on Iraq. It's been a year now since US and her barbaric hordes violated Iraq's sovereignty and accused the country-formerly-known-as Mesopotamia for possessing weapons of mass destruction.

They caught Saddam, bombed ancient cities, destroyed archaeological sites, took over industries, and made epal in national reconstruction.

Now, they haven't found what they are looking for. They still dont have the best and the sole evidence for their massacre of Iraq. How civilized...

Spain has experienced the wrath of these so-called terrorists, in a recent train bombing in Madrid. France, on the other hand, has leveled up its national security alarm, for the fear of retaliation, although she didn't support US on its attack.

So what's in-store for the Philippines now?

Our president vigorously supported and kissed the cowboy's ass last year. And until now, we're included in the infamous list or that fucking coalition of the willing minority.

Good luck.

Election is fast approaching.

Do you notice how our local political scene is slowly turning out to be a circus?

Were you able to see how Eddie Gil reacted when he was disqualified from the presidential race?

Will you vote for FPJ?

Are you aware that GMA has violated yet another COMELEC election rule, because her campaign TV ads has gone beyond the required hours for that particular media campaign?

And senatoriables Rasul and Anson-Roa (yes, Boots Anson-Roa, this is not a typographical error) has filed a disqualification case against her?

How about Revilla, Estrada, Jaworski et al dominating the senatoriables survey?

Or Loren Legarda appearing in FPJ television ads, with all the matte make-up and you're-not-allowed-to-be-near-me look?

Now, if this isnt enough for you, go grab a newspaper and read all about it. Or watch TV for goddamn sake's. Then tell me if you still wanna live in this country, or you wanna go somewhere else.

10 reasons why people are forced to do things they really dont want to do...

1. They wanna keep their relationship smooth-flowing as much as possible.

2. No choice.

3. Things are just so important, they have to pretend, or out of necessity, like work.

4. To avoid bloddy revolutions.

5. Some people are masochistic. They wanna feel that they are helpless and are left with no choice. They love it.

6. Most are futuristic. They expect the feeling of being coerced will eventually fade after a few hours or so.

7. They simply want the feeling of being important, that's why there's the element of force. Ego booster.

8. Death threats.

9. You feel that by giving in to the pressure, you'll make other people happy.

10. Some people are just so plain gullible, and they lack conviction.

The Passion

So, the new film by Mel Gibson is finally out on DVD (dibidi, dibidi). I saw it in the sidewalks last week, and Im raving to watch it. Sources say it is based on at least 6 books, including the Gospels ot the Fab 4. And of course, it has been pretty controversial since last year.

The Passion of the Christ stars the very promising James Caviezel of the Thin Red Line (which is far better than Saving Private Ryan, of course). Mel Gibson, on the other hand, is already award-winning, for directing Braveheart (swords used there were made in the Philippines by the way).

I can't wait to see The Passion of the Christ because it shows a different perspective on the last 12 hours of Jesus. It may shatter your faith on the man, but think of it this way, you're given a chance to see the truth about what really happened. The truth that has been deprived from us for centuries by the church or by the bible perhaps. The film allegedly blames the Jews for the cruxifiction of Jesus, and the scenarios are harsh! I've seen the trailer, and it's so realistic.

Maybe I wanna see it because I wanna see Jesus being punished, or hurt. You may say Im evil, but I really wanna picture someone so venerable or holy as a real human being, without the magical coatings, and all. I wanna see him cry, or being beaten, who knows, it may renew my faith to religion.

But basically I wanna see the film, because it's controversial. I dont want to be left out.

MY GRUDGE

In the middle of the night while you're too busy watching porn or approving friends on the internet, you heard a thump on the wall. You didn't mind, because it's just a thump. It may be your neighbors doing repairs (in the middle of the night? grrr.), or it may be just a cat, who knows. But what really caught your attention wasn't that single thump, but the successive and haunting sound it created. You got up, threw yourself right against the wall and waited for the sound to repeat itself. It never happened. the next day, same routine on your Friendster, the same thing happened again. Successive thumps, at exactly the same time, (say, 12:27 am ). You still ignored it, but it never stopped. In fact, it has even conquered your dreams. What will you do?

a. You continue on your net-surfing, because it is far more fun than pretending to be a paranoid.
b. You stick your head out of the window and yell to your neighbors, "Stop that kama sutra, go conventional!"
c. You invite your friends to your own version of a house party and assume that the thumps are just part of the whole bass-thing.
d. Or you panic, and call Ghostbusters.

Well, if that happens to me, I'd prefer letter B. It brings out the Caviteno blood in me, and besides it part of my instinct, hehe.

No, seriously, it's a scene from a Japanese movie I watched last week. I've been a sucker for foreign-language films since I started to learn how to read. It gives me the impression that Im watching an art film and with all the subtitles adorning it, it gives me an assurance that my attention span hasn't shorten yet.

Last weekend, my friend and I watched "Ju-On 2" or the movie more popularly known as "The Grudge 2". It's all about a haunted house with some gory history behind it. A woman was murdered there by her paranoid husband, due to some possession of a ghost, or something like that. It turned out, the hubby had his first child aborted, and the child sought revenge by always freaking him out. His other child though, is still at large, as of this moment.

What I like about this movie is that it has pushed me to limits my mind can't control. Naks, like, duh. Seriously speaking, the movie did some justice to some explanations about these weird things around us, like those thumpings and all. I don't actually believe in ghosts and other supernatural beings, but the way Ju-On explained why these things happen, astig lang.

It's so convincing, it gives me the creeps until now. It's so effective, the movie even made me write this article. It's not your usual mind-boggling film, or you wouldn't actually make assumptions about Japanese cinema by watching this movie, but it's worth your money. It's only 60 pesos anyway -- the usual meal worth on your Mc Donalds (so instead of supporting some Western food for 60 php, go watch an Asian movie -- huh? connect?).

I'll dwell on that some other time. : )

Where is the love?

California has junked the bill allowing Gay Marriages. Now, legislators in Massachussetts are making amendments on its law concerning the issue, and are actually in the process of trashing the possibility too.

Now, what the heck are they doing?

They are simply taking away two lover's right to love.

European countries have approved gay marriages decades ago. We all know for a fact that these countries emerged from civilizations that started thousand of years ago, therefore time has molded their intellect and culture to sophistication and understanding some countries are not aware of or are not exposed to.

The United States started its dominion over weaker countries only recently, particularly back in the 18th century. This country, however, has assumed superpower status since then, for the simple logic that the US wants to prove that she isn't a bastard country-rooting-from-British-imperialism only, instead she wants to gain imperialistic status out of jealousy. Therefore, tracing its heritage, it doesn't have any civilization to be proud of, or a culture she can call its own.

Now, going back to the gay marriages issue, and basing our claims from what I said regarding European and US culture, what can we conclude now?

You do the math.

Same shit, different day.

Here I go again, trying to pretend everything's ok.

Just so I notice everything's kinda in limbo right now. I dunno the main reason, maybe it's me, i dont know.

Ang hirap kasi. Mabigat sa loob. I just can't contain my feelings that's why Im writing again. I always dread these moments, they make me feel vulnerable and obnoxious.

I dont know how to satisfy you anymore. I dont know how to make you happy. I feel very futile.
It seems my every effort to keep the relationship smooth-flowing is not enough. There's always something missing or lacking.

I started giving you more freedom last week by not getting mad at your endless internet surfing of porn. I try not to get irritated by your sarcastic remarks and dense reactions. And I try to be more numb when you tell me things that directly hurt me inside. I try to be dense.

I hate how you turn silent when you're pissed off. I hate it when you make it seem it's all my fault. I hate it when I have to carry all these emotional burden, and feel responsible for what happened. I hate it when we're like this. I know we have to respect each other's right to self, but in this kind of relationship where one tends to be a part of the other one, directly or indirectly regardless of how much they avoid intervention, therefore making the whole thing inevitably intertwining, it's difficult.

I may not be the best guy for you, or far-out, the man of your dreams. I may not have your desired physique for a man. I may not have the willingness to succumb to you and be your ego-booster, cause I always contest your ideas. But one thing I know is for certain.... I love you. If that for you isn't enough, then I dont know what to do anymore.